I've heard arguments from both sides: Is there any hope for friendship after a major breakup?
My hopeful response is yes. I have already started developing a new type of bond with Brian. I can see already that there is a refreshing independence coming from both of us. Because we no longer have our futures promised to another person, we are free to pick up and leave whenever and wherever we please. This is a good change.
It does not mean that the feelings of confusion and sadness have suddenly disappeared, but I feel that having him around is somehow an important part of the process of getting over him. Hearing about how his future will pretty much have no monetary problems and he will lead a secure life is not easy. It brings up an ugly temptation that is easy for a person with pretty much no future (ie- an artist, ie-mean) to fall for. Confusing security and love is too easy, but I am aware of it enough to avoid it.
A friend of mine sent me a message in response to one of my blog posts. We messaged back and forth with long winded stories, questions, and advice for one another. She mentioned to me that she had forged a strong friendship with her first love. The friendship is strong enough that she does not have feelings of confusion for him and is dating someone else.
This is what I am striving to achieve. Of course, I am nowhere near being in a new relationship, it's still a little too soon for that. But being near Brian without feeling the guilt or doubts or love might be a relief. Whenever it may decide to happen. Also, being with someone new and not thinking about Brian and what I might be missing is something I need to know can happen for me.
Thoughts on this topic?
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Email: sketchstephyoung@hotmail.com
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1 comment:
hmmm i agree on a few things, and at least youre trying to actually get past where you are now and progress, and eh its hard to be entirely happy, just a little optimism will probably do! :)
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